Moo's sensory issues have elevated to the point where they are interfering with his quality of life. Do not take this as me saying that his sensory perception and his being are not one in the same... Milo's sensory perception is a gift in my eyes. I love watching him for hours painting to music, completely one with the paint and in his own universe. I adore the way he sees the world, and I have this deep gut feeling that this child is going to give the world beauty it has yet to see.
The issues I refer to are the anxiety and inability to grasp control over his own body. He's intelligent, not only a biased mother's opinion, but he soaks information up quicker than we can offer it... He puts his own spin on information, deep and layered analysis. But symptoms of his sensory "deficit" hinder him in sharing his thoughts, relaying what he knows, making it through his studio work, and maintaining healthy physical boundaries.
I read the frustration and the agitation in his face and body energy. It radiates like swarm of bees. Sometimes I swear he is pleading with me through his eyes, big brown puppy dog eyes just staring at me trying to relay a message.
His clothing has more gnawed holes than ever before, he refuses his theraband not wanting to be different than his classmates. He eats his studio work and materials... He eats his sister's drawings, his action figures, the Wii remote, his paper cup, boxes, wires, anything, everything he can get his hands on. Then we get an email from his teacher, Milo's eaten the studio's paint. (*non-toxic).
I went in to work with him for over an hour in his studio. He wanted so desperately to show me his work, and how he could navigate through it. It was pain staking to watch him shut down, overwhelmed, frustrated, embarrassed even. But he knew his work, he knows which work he's supposed to complete, where each item is located, and when I led him in focusing through it, he flew through it with ease.
We stuck with making him wear his glasses. We're starting back with the occupational therapy. We're redirecting. We're slowing down. We're letting him lead. We're teaming up with his teachers. As a family we're trying to meet his needs. The melt downs and tears keep coming like the wind is knocked out of him, like he's trying hard to communicate, but he can't create the words... maybe the emotions are too big for words. We are not meeting his needs.
Then I had a thought. If this is a biological matter, wouldn't it make sense to work from the inside out? We already knew to navigate away from artificial ingredients, sugars, etc. But what was his body needing?
I researched aspergers, autism, and ADHD on my work computer. Our information is backed up by multiple research studies. I felt a lot more confident digging for advice there versus the internet.
I do not believe my son has aspergers, autism, or ADHD... I don't know if I think anyone does, as much as I feel there are spectrums we all exist on, and we ALL exist on them, somewhere. What I do see are similar behaviors, and what I decided to assume is that the biology would speak the same language.
Across the research magnesium, folic acid, B6, B12, zinc, and DMG HCl (a natural amino acid that helps with neurotransmitters) were nourishing these children, giving them what their bodies were needing, and the parents were seeing results. Kids who couldn't verbal communicated, began speaking. Grades went up, kids could finally relay back the information they were taking in. etc.
Milo was already on a wonderful multi-vitamin and omega 3, 6, and 9. He eats mostly a vegetarian diet with a lot of variety of vegetables. When offered sweets 90% of the time he says "no thank you, that's too much sugar". Milo flips through pages of magazines lecturing me on the images "this is healthy, Mommy... This one, that's not healthy, don't eat it".
He's my lil health nut, but he still needed more.
I found a "Behavioral Blend" from Food Science of Vermont. It contains magnesium, folic acid, B6, B12, zinc, and DMG HCl! I took it to his doctor, and she was so excited that we had discovered this blend. She said it was safe for him to take, because its ingredients are all things that we can find in food sources/diet.
We tried it over the weekend, and I saw that peace and focus again in Milo. He seemed so comfortable in his own skin, and even though he still explores his world in a very tactile way, he has control and he has found his voice. Oh the wonderful thoughts and feelings he shares with us, and he is deeper in thought and deeper into exploring, playing, living... His mind allows him to stay awhile, navigate.
We stopped giving it to him on a Sunday to give him a break. He snapped Parker's violin bow in half, completely unintentional, simply not knowing the pressure he was placing upon it. He punched Parker in the pelvis, confused that it hurt her. He ate through his clothes, through his bracelet, through his toys, etc. We went back to square one.
He's on it twice daily now. His teachers saw a difference as well last week, and he'll start taking it twice daily before school and at lunch this week. They were happy for Milo to be able to engage fully in what he loved and to have better physical boundaries with his friends. I watched him pass up a pushing circle where his buddies were playing too rough. He simply went up the jungle gym and played on the bridge and rode down the slide.
He's still four. Tonight he rode down our back hill and crashed into the fence. Time and again. He's still going to do what his developmental stage requires. He's still Milo! But now he can fully explore himself without barriers and heavy anxiety.
There is never a miracle, one shot remedy. But I do feel like we are finding all the pieces to this puzzle. I'm happy that we have a support network with Moo's school, doctor, and our family and friends. Everyone is ready to support Milo in being "Milo". I don't want his sensory perception to be "corrected". I think he's world is a magical and beautiful world. We all just want to help him find the control to navigate it.
We made necklaces during a sick day from school this week. (we all caught strep! minus Ben who unfortunately got the stomach virus instead).
I'm not mad. I quite enjoyed to the full days home with the kids. We had a blast.
Two sleepy heads eating soup. Milo said he was a venus fly trap, and that he was eating a bowl of flies. Parker was the queen fly. Their imaginations have really being expanding recently. I love just listening and watching their lil worlds.
Milo is ready for St. Patty's Day with a Parker style green wig.
